War

This is not going to be a very spiritualy encouraging post, just some thoughts as I try to sort out the realities of war. I hate to even think about war, it's fine fought somewhere else. I like to picture people fighting in a big field somewhere, not venturing into villages, leaving the innocent untouched. But that is not the reality of war. Some men struggle for power and notoriety, others seek revenge, others believe they are fighting on the side of God - their god.

Then reality hits me - our country is at war at this very moment. Someone's son, someone's daughter is scared to death and fighting for his or her life at this very moment. That is reality. Generations have passed since war was fought on our soil. Since men, women and children had to run for their lives - flee their homes, their towns, to...well, to somewhere else...never safe. But that is what is going on in Iraq - people fleeing, women trying to protect their children, fathers fearing for their families and soldiers fighting a war that seems to have no end.

I'm not for or against the war. I'm not informed enough to stand behind anything, I don't really understand it all. Perhaps I'm just a product of my generation - distancing myself from it all so it's not reality. If I don't know what's going on I don't have to feel for the people, I dont have to feel helpless to do anything. I can just ignore it and go on with Christmas shopping, fashion news and worrying about what kind of cookies to make.

Sounds so shallow, doesn't it? But then tonight the cold hard reality of war breaks back in and I remember....I remember my friend who lost her husband back in 2001 - her husband of only 5 months - because he was a soldier on his way to Afganistan and got bombed. I remember my father, that he fought in Vietnam while people my age back home protested a war they didn't understand and didn't care about the men when they returned - men who were young like them and without a choice to fight or not, men who also didn't understand it all but were fulfilling their duty. I remember a young man afraid to be in large groups of people - afraid and always watching his back - even when he's home, because the sights and sounds of war never leave his mind. I think of a woman trying to raise 3 children while her husband is in Iraq for a year - then trying to come together again when the year is over and it's like he's a total stranger. I think of the men who killed themselves when they returned from Iraq last year to find their wives had deserted them.

War is an ugly thing. I don't care what they're fighting for - if it's your son out there dying, you've got to decide if you believe in the cause or not. I guess there are times that no resolution can be found in my mind. Nothing can justify all the death and destruction. There are real people, with real families, real children, dying every day.
I've got to let that sink in. But I don't know what to do about it.